Бал благополучно отменяется, ибо у меня на следующий день экзамен по мировой политике. У человека, с которым я хотела танцевать вальс из-за которого я хотела на этот цирк пойти, тоже. А так как он у нас мальчик сознательный, сидеть ему двадцать восьмого числа дома с распечатками.
Спасибо тебе, сессия, за все хорошее, ага.
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Я так хочу в Британию! Сил больше нет.
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докторовское-фанатское № 28: очередное про безграничность человеческой фантазии или заявки с кинк-феста. WARNINGS: English & многабукв. зато весело.Пейринги я когда-то уже выписывала. Ну, мне когда плохо и дофига делать, я оперативно лезу в это непередаваемо чудесное сообщество, повышать свой боевой дух. И, как следствие, занимаюсь вовсе не тем, чем надо. Зато боевой дух быстро повышается, ага.
Одним словом, мои любимые заявки. Вот они прям такие и есть.
И да, я люблю этих людей.

Jenny sets out to shag all her father's ex-lovers in an attempt to understand him.

Ace inserts an explosive into Jack's ass for sexual kinks and then detonates it while orgasming.

The Doctor gets his cock stuck inside Rose. How will they sort that one out? вот уж проблема так проблема

You know that giant sonic thing Nyssa builds in the Visitation? Fic where she turns it into some sort of masturbation device please. Solo or with Tegan or whoever.

Rose/Martha - Fight! Fight! Fight! Then done sex.

Jenny/Susan, incest (obvs) obvs меня добил

Seven, Ace, and the Master (Seven/Ace, Seven/Master, all three, whatever), hot Cheetah sex. Kitty!Master is doing kitty!sex!.. sorry

Doctor/RTD, any kink or none I don't CARE! бгг. бгг. бгг. это была заявка РТД, бгг. damn good fic by the way. бгг. а какие там комментарии, о_о

After Jenny's death, the Doctor reverently kisses her vibrator. And then other stuff happens, whatever you want.

The Doctor heals his fandom by fucking Rose and Martha at the same time.

Master/Jenny. Jenny gets fucked by the Master, just like her dad, up the arse. And loves it. Mostly because a) HAWT and b) there is not enough fic in which a woman enjoys anal sex. Is fandom capable of producing such a thing?

The first seven Doctors get together and make Eight, Nine, and Ten their bitches as punishment for fucking up the end of the Time War. They are very naked and servile and all the while One, Two, Three, Four, Five (YES EVEN FIVEY), Six and Seven are all lordly and shit. yes-yes, even fivey

Doctor/River, she spoilers him for his own orgasm.

Mickey/Jake, Jake pretends Mickey is Ricky

The Doctor/any or all of the Three Sisters: Time, Pain and Death. No cheating by making a companion represent them. The Doctor shagging Time incarnate, Pain incarnate, or Death incarnate.

The Doctor and Mel get infected by an alien virus which causes them to sing uncontrollably, to get rid of the virus, they need to have hot shaggingz.

Tennant/Doctor, getting into character

Mickey/big yellow truck, saving the world. это я уже писала, но... но!

The TARDIS is broken. In order to pay for new parts, the Doctor and his companions shoot an amateur porn movie.

Doctor/Vashtanaskeleton. OTP, baby. OTP.

Donna/Brigadier - the Brigadier gives Donna a newfound respect for the military.

Master/Doctor's TARDIS. The horrible, humiliating things she made him do before she would allow him to push his big, clumsy laser screwdriver in and out and all over delicate parts.

Five/Six/Peri, Five and Peri punish Six for his behaviour. и есть ведь за что, черт возьми!

Six/Whatever Villain non-con. For once, the villain of the week doesn't want to shag Peri

Master/President!Romana. He needs some convincing to join in the Time War

When Rose is aroused by The Passion of the Christ Ten realises he's overdone the Jesus imagery a bit. But what the hell, nails through the feet quite appeals anyway.

Jack is a virgin until Sarah Jane agrees to help him out. Jack! a virgin! yeah, help him, Sarah Jane!

The Eighth Doctor is annoyed. Some skinny bastard has stolen his Most Shaggable Doctor status. He seeks him out and pr0n is about to ensue when an even more annoyed Fifth Doctor arrives... This is clearly too sensible, so in addition I would like to request the inclusion of buttermilk and Karl Marx.

A Dalek penetrates Ten and then uses him to fuck a Cyberman. да! оно мое любимое! любимое мое оно!

Omega meets Audio!Rassilon. They commiserate about being stuck in silly alternate universes and have a pity shag with optional grudges and megalomania.

Black Guardian/Ainley!Master- mindsex in Turlough's head... I'm going to the special hell for that, aren't I? таки бедный рыжий школьник, это же гораздо хуже, чем какие-то там барабаны.

Jack/Sontarans, what would a nonsexual, cloned species do with Jack

Turlough, Mel, and Tegan (and the other ginger characters) have an orgy with Jack. No one's sure what genes the kid has, but Jack's incubating it for nine months. [The baby is Donna.] fuck my brain!

The unexpected adventures of unexpected naked!Benton and the orgy which followed. Bonus points for the inclusion of the TCE or the Doctor penis radar from the same episode.

The Smiths vs. the Joneses - Orgy competition God, YES!

Time Lord!Doctor/Doctor!Donna/Human!Doctor - Jack writes fanfic about these three. I'm sure, he did after all. I'd do if I were Jack. fic is here!

Half-Human!Ten/Rose, fisting (and yeah, with that hand) многострадальная лапка, никак не дадут ей разложиться

Frobisher/Peri, true love inside Six, who has inexplicably transformed into a 1968 Chevrolet Sportvan.

The Black & White Guardians come back as scantily clad nubile women and trick the Doctor into a Threesome- Female!Black Guardian/Doctor/Female!White Guardian я знала! я так и знала, что они трансы!

Six/Romana, how will he convince her to sleep with him? да, мне тоже интересно

Donna screwing a giant chewing gum. That is so fucking sick lol

Donna/Agatha Christie/Doctor. Donna shocks The Doctor by shagging Agatha

Any combination of Sarah Jane, Adult Maria, and the sonic lipstick

Three ties down the Master and shaves all his hair off, yes even the eyebrows, beard and pubic hair

The Doctor is shite at regeneration because he was busy shagging the Master during that lesson

Rose and the Doctor kill themselves because they can't be apart. While they're dying, they masturbate and come at the same time. idiot Romeo Doctor is idiot Romeo

During Harold Saxon's rise to power, he meets the Doctor's human mother who is working for him in some capacity. They have sex. and that's how The Doctor was born!

The Doctor is jealous when he finds out that Sarah Jane called her compuer Mr Smith. Hatesex. By which I mean Doctor/Mr Smith hatesex. He could never hate his Sarah Jane!

Any actor or writer or whatever discovers this community. And likes it. fic is here

Simm!Master/Jareth from Labyrinth - Erotic Dancing While the Doctor Runs in the Labyrinth to win the Master back

Ten/Classic companions- Ten sets to prove he's better in the sack then his previous incarnations and fails

Dalek bumps are highly sensitive erogenous zones I'm sure, they are

Arthur Eddington/John Smith - Gentleness. They disagree about spanking. Arthur shows John it's not necessary вот я честно поражаюсь репутации Джона Смита у народа. все, абсолютно все кинки с ним завязаны на том, что Джон расхаживает с тростью и применяет ее на партнерах в постели (хотя чаще на столе). меняются только партнеры (в основном, конечно, это Марте так сказочно везет, хотя по мне deaged Master гораздо интереснее). шейм он ю, извращенцы, Джон Смит в каноне и мухи не обидит
The Doctor has regenerated into the Valeyard, and he won't take the Master's crap anymore

Ten's hair/Eleven's hair - Any Kink. Bonus for Eleven's invisible eyebrow/Ten's eyebrow

Gallifrey doesn't just have journalists and the BBC High Council - it also has fandom. Time Lord Real Person Slash (or Het). Any pairing you want, up to and including President Romana and Orgy of Rassilon, complete with two K9s, but keep it to the renegades and people actually on Gallifrey, so no humans aside from Leela.

Handy/Jackie Tyler. Don't care what kink, just want to see them shagging! honestly? me too. and I'm going straight to hell. 'cause I ship Handy/Rose for god's sake!

The Doctor finds a rather graphic Doctor/Master fic online (maybe something along the lines of him being kept as the Master's sex slave), and is at first indignant that humans get off on reading/writing that stuff about him (after all he's done for us!), but the more he reads of it, the more turned on he gets. after all he's done for you! bloody perverts!

Six, by himself. He loves to hear himself talk so much that he talks himself to orgasm. honestly? I wouldn't be suprised.

Peter Davison/Matthew Waterhouse. Hatesex

The real reason Two was being chased by the Yeti in The Five Doctors. Yeti/Two's coat

Ainley! Master/Simm! Master/Ten. Ainley!Master just wants the other two to calm. the fuck. down. ...or at least stop talking for more than ten seconds

Ten/Malcolm. Geek sex

Ten/Lady Christina. Pseudo Incest. She's uncannily like Jenny would have been what can I say? yep.

Three/Silurian. The Doctor's body temperature (warmer than a reptile, cooler than a human) is erotically stimulating to them.

Dom!Mel punishes the Doctor for not drinking his carrot juice

Jack/Ten/2008!Sarah Jane, Ten sandwich. Make it work somehow, anon! I need this like breathing!

Catherine finds out David writes Ten/Donna (and/or CT/DT RPF) fanfiction in his free time

Nine/Rose - this regeneration has no genitals so he shows Rose his room of fucking machines

Jack/The TARDIS. She needs love and attention after The Year That Never Was but the Doctor's too distracted

Adric/Nyssa. Virgins.

For some reason the Master can't get Jenny pregnant, so they're trying to force the Doctor to. and that's how The Master was born!

The Master makes Lucy dress up like Five. poor Lucy

During RotC/AoS Rose finds herself where she's always wanted to be -- with the cocks of all the men she loves the most inside of her. Rose/Mickey/Ten/Alt!Pete poor Rose

Ian/Barbara. Baby-making sex.

Ten/Gadget (is it Gadget or Gadget Gadget?) When he said he hated robots, he was lying soo sweet

Ten/Queen Elizabeth. Completely canonical sexy post-nuptial sex.

Turlough/5-10.The Doctor keeps coming back for more. seriously, if I were Turlough, I'd be scared
RoboSkull!Master/Ten. Electricity

Bonus! RTD/Moffat

Bonus 2! Doctor/who-kink anon
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Я хочу пожрать собственную лень. И дедлайны.
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Что меня не перестает удивлять в иных собакоюзерах, так это когда вот он (ну, чаще она, конечно) пишет пост, а затем добавляет в конце "я не собираюсь это обсуждать". Не раз я на такое натыкалась и у разных людей, и все меня тянет спросить: товарищи, а почему вы не жмете на кнопочку "без комментариев", это же так просто. Куда проще, чем писать длинное "я не собираюсь это обсуждать". Я уж молчу про то, что "я не собираюсь это обсуждать" с открытыми комментариями выглядит провокационно.
Я вот всегда жму на эту кнопочку, когда не хочу что-то обсуждать.